Identity...

"We Enter Relationships As A Somebody And Leave Them As A Nobody"

was the name that popped up on my computer as a friend signed in today, and it got me thinking about identity. Clearly she seemed to think that she only had an identity or was somebody when she was in a relationship and that once that was taken away she was a nobody.

When are girls going to learn that relationships and guys don't define who we are? They may just aid us in the life long journey of helping bring out our character more. There is such a sense of self-worthlessness nowadays. I was watching a programme earlier with 5 people who all struggled with self-esteem and the things they did in order to cover it up-literally.

Why is it that people so often put their identity in places and people that are no good for them, I know that I myself struggle with identity, that I'd love a relationship and a guy but to base all my life and personality on that person? To be so ruled and subjected to such a person seems strange to me. It shouldn't be other people that define our identity, they can help influence it and help us grow but define us? Practically own our identity-no, that's not how it's meant to be.

My heart is constantly aching for the girls of this world who struggle with identity and I am not pretending I know who I am completely, but I'm happy to know that I am a child of God and that I was made this way for a reason (what reason-I don't know). It's getting harder and harder to spend my life watching these girls get more and more obsessed with hair, make-up, image, guys etc, but what can I do? I want to make a difference, to be different but how?

One thing that stuck out in this documentary I watched was this quote from a guy, talking about women wearing make-up and that it wasn't needed:

"The only time a guy notices if a girl is wearing make-up is when she's wearing too much. We wouldn't notice it if you only had a bit on."-They wouldn't notice-meaning they'd think you're beautiful anyway! So why slap LOADS on?

My challenge: love yourself for yourself and don't spend a lifetime of trying to impress someone else, they should love you for you. Be radical-wear make-up on special occasions, so a guy falls in love with your real face and is pleasantly surprised when he sees you even more dolled up. Even I can learn from that as well.